Criterion Collection- Worthy (ish) Chavo del 8 Alternative Ending

The beginning may be little bit Bergman and a teensy bit Hitchcock but the rest is pure Chavo Nostalgia. Revelations abound.

Como Que Peter Hernández Won't Make You Sound Too Famous

H.N.P.D. (Hispanic Name Projection Disease)

In the April issue of GQ magazine, Bruno Mars a.k.a. Peter Hernández, explains juicy bits, like a tweet to his fans about the object of his song: 'Locked Out of Heaven' *("As in da pussay leche") and the origin of his birth-given name.

He dealt with the obligatory expectations of the industry by changing his name, instead of caving in to singing Latin tunes -which is what any Hernandez does- and because he was told that idols like Enrique Iglesias were so "hot" at the time. So enter the last name Mars, "perhaps figuring that the best way to avoid being stereotyped by race is to sound as though you come from a different planet altogether..."

Indeed.

How sad though that we still have to walk away from a birth-right to gain acceptance in the mainstream. Bruno Mars' own melting pot is filled with rich worldly ingredients of the backgrounds of his parents: "Puerto Rican Jewish percussionist from Brooklyn and a singer and dancer from the Philippines who met in Hawaii'. Wow. I want some of that but I don't get it from Hernandez and I certainly don't get it form Mars.

*Note: Did search to link back to the original tweet, but Google bombarded me with images and links that will take some brain bleach to erase. I'll leave it up to the TextMex reader to find for yourselves. 

Image: GQ magazine

As Shakespirito Once Said: A Taco by Any Other Name...

McDonald's is looking to crush the Subway market share with the "Mc Wrap" some meat, lettuce, and tomato wrapped inside a flour tortilla. 

 

Via: Advertising Age

If Margarita Carmen Cansino can become Rita Hayworth, then Peter Hernandez can emerge as Bruno Mars... via NBC LATINO

click the image below for the hotlink to NBC LATINO...

The History Channel made Satan look like someone we know

Twitter lit up with comments when folks caught glimpse of an episode of  The Bible, a series for the History Channel. Apparently to some viewers,  the character of Satan bears a striking resemblance to our president. One wonders if the creators were thinking of casting dark characteristics as a poetic reference to evil, or perhaps evil, in this case, is the usual dark-skinned trope. Dear textmexers: You be the deciders.

¡Fijate Nomás! Got Milk? Done Right

Channeling a sexy version of  Doña Florinda, Quico's romantic mother, Salma Hayek can't help sprinkling motherhood with 50's glamour. Ninja pouring skills aside, apparently the diminutive legs dangling off to the side, belong to Valentina, Ms. Hayek's first born. Not to worry, Valentina might be a little bit French, but her mother Salma intends to raise her daughter with all of the Mexicanness she can possibly instill in her little one.

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Image courtesy of the Breakfast Project

Rita Hayworth in BLOOD AND SAND | Publicity Glossy (/Ethnography) Auction via Heritage

One of the more remarkable Rita Hayworth photographs archived on this site--as with most photos published here, click to enlarge...

Intense Pre Surrealist gaze: La Pequeña Frida

 

 Taken by her father Guillermo Kahlo (Carl Wilhelm Kahlo) on June 15, 1919.

Ben Shapiro: Ethnic Studies Only Good For Meeting Girls

"I took Jewish studies courses when I was at UCLA. There are only two reasons to take a Jewish studies course. The first is to meet girls and the second is to get an easy A. And that’s why most students are taking ethnic studies courses."

Mr. Shapiro looking like a tightly wound-up tight Ken doll explains to an amused Megan Kelly, in a Fox News Live segment, that Ethnic studies perpetuate radical anti-American sentiment, due to the myopic views which Ethnic studies promote.

Give Mr. Shapiro a big LOL for comedic timing and being such a ladies man. In the mean time Arizona continues to be the place where "ethnic" just about anything is grounds for suspicion and censorship.  Mr Shapiro is the author of:  Brainwashed: How Universities Indoctrinate America’s Youth.

Lecture on French Theory and Lucha Libre at CSUF, CAL STATE FULLERTON, Tuesday, March 19, 2013 at 11:30am in Humanities 516

Who is that masked Japanese Político?

A storm sits percolating in the southern Japan city of Oita, where a politician a la Santo Enmascarado refuses to take off his Luchador mask in order to attend city council meetings. The council members are prohibiting newly elected Skull Reaper A-ji to participate in city business unless he is unmasked. Skull Reaper refuses to give into the demand explaining that without his mask he is someone else.

¡Claro! Because when the real Santo went places without his cape, and instead donned meticulous leisure suits, no one demanded the removal of his silver mask. The mask was the point. Citing his past civil work, Mr. Skull Reaper Aji expresses he simply wants to keep helping his constituents. Stay tuned for the unraveling of  this suspenseful Japanese Mexican novela.

On another note, let us meditate on the mesmerizing effects of the transnational power of Mexican Lucha Libre all the way in Japan.

To learn more about the black, red, and white Skull Reaper, and if you read Japanese, check this out.

Via: Gawker

Rita Hayworth and More! Recent Auctions @ Heritage...

sources:

http://movieposters.ha.com/c/item.zx?saleNo=161311&lotNo=53051&type=wlem&wlc=205433294

http://movieposters.ha.com/c/item.zx?saleNo=161311&lotNo=53397&type=wlem&wlc=205433293

Yet Another Entry in the Bizarre Caucasian Bestiary

tumblr source trail

Before She Was RITA HAYWORTH (And Before Over a Year of Electrolysis), Margarita Dolores Carmen Cansino Roamed Southern California

The transformation from Margarita Carmen Cansino to Rita Hayworth is the stuff of Hollywood legend--and one of the minor obsessions of this blog. In any event, I ran across the best pre-electrolysis shot of Rita I have seen in awhile--it is reproduced below and here.

Sofia Vergara Shoots Up the Screen With a Brassiere/Machine Gun in MACHETE KILLS (Robert Rodriguez's Upcoming Sequel to Machete | September 2013)

click to enlarge

Robert Rodriguez has opened the flood gates of info for his September 2013 sequel to Machete, MACHETE KILLS (both, sequels in a way to the "fake trailer" masque that was part of Rodriguez's and Quentin Tarantino's GRINDHOUSE collaboration from 2007). For the purposes of the Tex[t]-Mex Galleryblog (sequel itself to Tex[t]-Mex: Seductive Hallucinations of the 'Mexican' in America) ever-curious about the figuration of "Mexicans" in America, most striking amidst the optical treasure trove of released materials to date is the most recent visual bonbon to emerge, the clickable image opposite of Colombiana Sofia Vergara, née Sofía Margarita Vergara Vergara.  Most vividly documented online in the staid and reserved the UK's Daily Mail, Rodriguez's poster captures the representational zeitgeist of Tex[t]-Mex, rendering the book obsolete in one fell swoop. If one of the purposes of said tome was to explore how Latina/o figuration (in a U.S. context) is always being fused (and suffused) with an illicit, dark, always-already violent form of promiscuous, tantalizing sexuality, then Rodriguez's poster ups the ante--mesmerizing with its over-the-top fusing of archetypal opposites: breasts (or at the very least, brassieres, via synecdoche) symbolizing (literally) the mother's milk of nurturing amalgamated here with machine guns, perhaps the utter semiotic avatar of mayhem, murder and death. Something to mull (or *symbolically speaking* suck on) this fine Sunday morning. More on this to come!  Here's an IGN news brief on the Vergara poster and Rodriguez's upcoming opus: